Going by the number of times that unfortunate incidents have been blamed on ‘village people’, I believe that it is safe to say that the village people have now become the victims, and not the ones that inflict harm.

Too often, we blame other people for the mishaps that happen to us but the truth is that if we look closely we are actually self-sabotaging ourselves.  After all, someone who knows he has a job interview for 8 am cannot wakeup by 7:30 am and starting cooking beans!

So, in what ways could you be self-sabotaging?

1. Having an I-don’t-care attitude
It is good that you realize that ‘you can not come and kee yourself’ but then, there must be some form of balance. This belief that you are to take life easy can easily translate to nonchalance if you are not careful. You become a spectator in life and then life passes you by. Often, people are this way because they are afraid of losing if they try but how can you even win, if you don’t try?

2. Being an innocent critic
You know those types of people who always blame other people for the things that go wrong. They have the perfect criticism for everyone though they never lift a finger themselves to do anything about the situation. This may be you: you use criticism to boost your ego because it is easier to ‘rebel’ against the world than admit that you feel left out. If you don’t own up to the truth, you will never get the help you need to rise because people will be too busy avoiding you and your endless criticism.

3. Suppressing your emotions
They say that the patient dog eats the fattest bone and this is why a lot take a truckload of crap. At work, you have a terrible boss and you swallow it. At home, your husband is a terrorist but you never speak up. In your relationships, someone is taking advantage of you but you keep taking it and so on. If you never stand up for yourself or express how you feel about nasty experiences, you are slowly killing yourself. Speak up today and you’ll feel free! With freedom comes the chance to explore and grow.

4. Trying to measure up when you never reach
It is okay to aim for the stars but be truthful about it. Some of us try so hard to measure up to certain standards and in the end, we hurt ourselves because we miss opportunities. When you present a bigger image of yourself than you really are, it turns people off (for those that find you out) or it makes people feel that you don’t need the opportunity. Be yourself.

When it comes to self-growth, we often do not realize that the largest determinant is ourselves.

It is not really about where you come from, education background, family, beliefs or economy. Yes, these things count too but they don’t carry as much weight as you. You can either be your own greatest cheerleader or your largest stumbling block. The choice is all yours.

However, it may be that you have been a stumbling block to your own success without realizing it. This is why this series focuses on different ways you may be your own village people, hindering your growth.

Having read through this list of four, which do you think describes you the most and how are you going to work on it?

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